How To Love Yourself Like You Mean It: 9 Beautiful Self-Love Tips

Your ultimate guide to self-love that will help you love yourself like you really mean it!

Loving yourself is not always easy. In fact, some days it even feels impossible.

We always compare ourselves with others, criticize every little thing about ourselves, and put this pressure on our minds to be perfect.

Oh, and don’t even get me started on all the noise from social media.

Besides making us feel less than, our online feeds also make self-love feel like another trend you’re just supposed to follow, even though nobody tells you how to do it right.

In this post, I am going to share the right way to go about self-love and make it a part of your identity.

This is not going to be about bubble baths and retail therapy, though those are sure nice.

This post is more about learning how to love yourself like you truly mean it, even when you feel messy or unworthy or not enough.

You’ve spent so much time loving other people, supporting them, believing in them, and encouraging them. Now it’s your turn, dear reader.

Because you are the longest relationship you’ll ever have, and you deserve to make it a loving one.

How To Truly Love Yourself - 9 Best Practices

Here are the 9 best self-love tips that will make you love yourself unconditionally.

How To Really Love Yourself

1. Start Being More Honest With Yourself

Before you can love yourself, you need to know yourself. Like, really know yourself.

Because just like you can’t possibly truly love someone without knowing them, you can’t love yourself without knowing your true self either.

The easier way to make this happen is by being real with yourself and being honest about where you’re at emotionally, mentally, and physically.

Stop running from your uncomfortable thoughts, and learn to face your true emotions head-on, no matter how ugly they may be.

Don’t hesitate to confront yourself by asking questions like:

How do I really feel most days?
What do I say to myself when I make a mistake?
Do I treat myself with the same kindness I offer to others?

Self-love doesn’t start with pretending to be happy all the time, or acting okay when you’re clearly not.

It starts with acknowledging your truth, whatever that may look like right now.

By doing this, you’ll be able to practice self-love even on your bad days—because you won’t be hiding from yourself anymore.

It becomes easier to access when you’re honest with yourself

You don’t have to fix everything before you love yourself. You can love yourself in the middle of the mess.

2. Talk to Yourself Like You Would Talk to a Friend

Imagine your best friend just told you they messed something up or they’re feeling insecure.

Would you tell them they’re a failure? That they’re never going to get it right?

Of course not! You’d probably say something kind, encouraging, and real. Right?

It’s worth asking, then, why don’t we talk to ourselves that way? Like we would talk to a friend in need?

One of the most powerful shifts you can make in your life is changing your inner dialogue. It’s key to true self-love. Being your own best friend.

Start by noticing the way you speak to yourself.

You might find it to be harsh, critical, and demanding, as it tends to be at the beginning of every self-love journey.

Slowly, start to shift this energy. I am not asking you to fake positivity, but surely you can aim for kindness. We are all capable of being kind to ourselves.

Affirmations like these can help:

I’m allowed to make mistakes.
I’m learning. That counts for something.
This was hard, but I’m proud of how I handled it.

Ah, just typing that was so relieving for me. I hope you felt that too. That’s self-love at its simplest form.

3. Set Boundaries Like They’re an Act of Love

I have a truth bomb for you:

You teach people how to treat you by the boundaries you set.

And setting boundaries is one of the most powerful ways to show yourself love.

That means saying “no” when you mean no, walking away when someone disrespects you, and not explaining or apologizing for choosing yourself.

Setting boundaries doesn’t make you selfish. It makes you emotionally healthy. It helps you protect your peace, your energy, and your heart.

Boundaries aren’t walls. They’re doors with locks. You decide who gets a key.

A post that will help: How to Set Healthy Boundaries With Others – 10 Realistic Ways

4. Learn the Difference Between Self-Love and Self-Indulgence

Sometimes, we confuse loving ourselves with doing whatever feels good in the moment. In common language, we call it ‘indulging’.

But real self-love is deeper than temporary comfort. It’s about caring for your future self as much as your present one.

Self-indulgence will tell you, “Skip everything and avoid your responsibilities because you’re tired.”

Self-love will tell you, “Take a break now, because rest matters. But then come back and do what you need to do, because your goals matter too.”

Loving yourself means sometimes doing the harder thing, the grown-up thing, and the boring thing, too.

That’s how you take care of yourself in the long run.

So, know the difference between self-love and self-indulgence, and choose the former over the latter as often as you can.

5. Stop Waiting Until You’re ‘Better’ to Accept Yourself

How often have you told yourself:

I’ll feel confident when I lose weight.
I’ll be proud of myself when I get promoted.
I’ll love myself when I finally fix everything.

Can we let that go, please?

You are not a project. You’re a person. And you don’t have to wait until you’re ‘finished’ to be worthy of love.

You can love yourself right now, even with the unhealed parts, the insecurities, and the imperfections.

If you don’t learn to love yourself now, you’ll just keep moving the finish line.

And you’ll always feel like you’re chasing love instead of standing in it.

So, you wanna love yourself like you mean it? Then start today. Right now, right this second.

It’s the only way your inner self will learn to trust you again, especially when you need it most.

6. Choose Nourishment Over Numbing

When things feel heavy in life, we all have ways of escaping. Scrolling, overworking, overeating, binging Netflix, etc.

We do all this in an attempt to numb ourselves.

But healing happens when we nourish ourselves, not numb.

Nourishment means:

Journaling instead of bottling it up.
Taking a walk instead of reaching for another glass of wine.
Calling a friend instead of scrolling for hours.
Reading a book instead of watching episode after episode.

I am not trying to make you conscious of how you soothe yourself.

Self-love doesn’t mean never numbing out. We’re human, after all.

It just means choosing nourishment more often than not, because that’s what really helps you in the long run. And it’s a super good habit to nurture.

7. Forgive Yourself

Self-love is not possible without self-forgiveness.

You need to learn how to let go of regret about past stuff — all the things you wish you hadn’t said or hadn’t done when you didn’t know any better.

You’re allowed to feel sorry, and often you need to so that you can learn from your mistakes.

But you’re not required to carry guilt forever. It will make your life worse.

Don’t deny responsibility, but acknowledge what happened, learning from it, and choose to move forward with compassion.

It’s okay to grow and evolve past your mistakes. And it’s okay to forgive yourself, even if others don’t.

8. Create a Life You Actually Enjoy Living

Sometimes, we try to love ourselves in a life we secretly hate. That makes it hard, doesn’t it?

Self-love is indeed internal, but it also depends on your external life.

If you design a life that feels aligned with who you really are, then of course it will be easy to love yourself.

I am not asking you to quit your job or move countries.

Just start by considering these questions:

What fills you up?
Who makes you feel seen?
What kinds of spaces make you feel safe?
What hobbies and dreams have you been putting off?

You can beautify your life just by redecorating your space, spending time in nature, and learning a new skill.

Build a life that makes you happy, not one that just looks good to other people!

9. Keep Showing Up For Yourself

Self-love is very much a feeling, but it’s also displayed by action. It’s a practice, not a mood.

There will be days when you’ll feel confident and full of light, and showing yourself love will come naturally.

You’ll be journaling, hydrating, setting boundaries like a boss, and feeling like you’re finally getting it.

But then, there will be days when it’s hard to even get out of bed. Days when your mind is heavy, your heart is tired, and you don’t feel like doing anything that’s ‘good for you’.

And those are the days that matter the most.

Real self-love is about showing up for yourself even when you don’t feel like it. Not perfectly, not dramatically, but just consistently.

Make your bed, drink a glass of water, and whisper something kind to yourself when your thoughts get loud.

Every small act of love on the hard days builds trust within you. It tells your inner self, “I’ve got you. I won’t abandon you. I’ll keep coming back.”

So, dear reader, keep showing up for yourself, and keep doing things that scream ‘self-love’.

If you fall short, try again, because that’s how true love works.

You Are Worthy Of Self-Love, Always

Loving yourself means choosing to be on your own team.

It means choosing not to abandon yourself, especially on the hard days. It means looking in the mirror and seeing someone worth fighting for.

You don’t need to earn love. You don’t need to become someone else. You don’t need to tick every box or fix every flaw.

So, please, go ahead, and begin your self-love journey. You are worthy of love now, just as you are.